Chapter 34: The Imperial Carriage

Before long, Emperor Hongzhi had put on the clothes of a medical official. He then rode out of the palace through a side gate in a small sedan chair. Several eunuchs and dozens of guards accompanied him, all dressed in plain clothes.

Zhu Houzhao followed behind in another small sedan chair. Once outside the palace, he acted like a bird freed from its cage, hopping around excitedly. He lifted the curtain and looked out with clear, curious eyes at the street scenes along the way. Even the ordinary passersby were enough to capture Zhu Houzhao’s attention for a long time, keeping him excited.

When they arrived at the Fang Residence, Emperor Hongzhi did not get out of the sedan chair immediately. He had already thought this through: Fang Jinglong was still on duty at this time, so the only person who might recognize him was probably Fang Jifan. Apart from him, there was also an unknown attendant.

Liu Qian understood his master’s intentions well. He stepped forward and said to the gatekeeper of the Fang Family, “His Majesty has heard that the Nanhe Bozi is suffering from a brain illness, and has specially sent a medical official to visit. Go quickly and report, tell Fang Jifan to come and…” He was about to say “welcome the imperial carriage,” but quickly changed his words: “…to welcome the visitor.”

After hearing this, the gatekeeper subconsciously muttered, “Another imperial physician?”

But seeing the eunuch’s cold expression, the gatekeeper did not dare to delay. He hurried inside to deliver the message.

Soon after, Emperor Hongzhi heard a rather discordant voice: “Oh no, oh no, the imperial physicians are here, the imperial physicians are here again…”

“Huh?” Emperor Hongzhi was taken aback.

But the entire Fang household had already erupted into chaos.

Manager Yang, who was patrolling the front courtyard, trembled for a moment, and in an instant, transformed into a seasoned Grand General, commanding calmly: “Where is the Young Lord?”

“In the back courtyard.”

“Wang Hu, Da Niu, hurry, go and restrain him. Do not harm the Young Lord.”

“Yes.”

Two stout servants puffed out their chests and charged toward the back courtyard like wolves and tigers.

Manager Yang still had his hands behind his back, his eyes gleaming sharply. “Go find Accountant Liu. Lock up the Accounts Office. Tell him, ‘The accounts are with the person.’ Where is Deng Jian? Where is that Deng Jian… Wasn’t he supposed to be with the Young Lord? Is he with the Young Lord?”

“He is with the Young Lord.”

Manager Yang let out a sigh of relief; that made him feel a bit more at ease. “Invite the three Provincial Graduates in the residence. They are the Young Lord’s disciples. Ask them for help.”

As he spoke, his voice was firm and resolute: “The rest of you, guard every area. Guard them well. Not even a fly can be allowed to reach the roof!”

…

Fang Jifan was comfortably lying on a recliner under the grape trellis in the inner garden.

Deng Jian stood bent over to the side, waiting for orders. Meanwhile, Xiaoxiangxiang slightly bent her body. Though she wore a dress, her graceful curves were unconsciously visible. She clenched her delicate fists and gently massaged Fang Jifan’s legs.

Beside them was a small tea table with a steaming cup of tea and some fruits.

Fang Jifan popped a broad bean, still in its shell, into his mouth. Then he lay back contentedly, imagining the back garden as a beach. As for Xiaoxiangxiang, he pictured her as a beauty in a bikini. With such an image in his mind, he suddenly felt that life had no shortcomings.

This felt like the life of a foolish son from a landlord’s family, but Fang Jifan couldn’t bring himself to be happy.

This corrupt life will wear down my willpower, hmm… never again, never again, never again!

Just then, Fang Jifan suddenly saw a blur before his eyes. Wang Hu and Da Niu from his household charged over swiftly. The two of them puffed white breath from their nostrils, like two young bulls, closing in from both sides to trap Fang Jifan.

In the distance, Manager Yang jogged over with seven or eight servants, panting heavily as he shouted, “Young Lord, the imperial physicians are here again, the imperial physicians are here again!”

Again…

Fang Jifan was dumbfounded.

Then Xiaoxiangxiang stopped massaging his legs. As if she had been instructed earlier, she watched Fang Jifan warily.

Deng Jian was straightforward. He quickly built up his emotions, his eyes turning red, and let out a wail as he cried: “Young Lord…” He knelt at Fang Jifan’s feet, crying with snot and tears.

Fang Jifan was even more bewildered… This situation was quite serious. Anyone who didn’t know better would think the Emperor was on an inspection tour.

Manager Yang arrived with a group of about twenty servants. Some bowed, some knelt. On the surface, they all looked pitiful, but their positions subtly followed military tactics. Fang Jifan was surrounded tightly from all sides, with no gaps left.

Uh… it seems… a bit awkward.

Last time, I was just making a scene. Do you really think I enjoy climbing onto the roof? I’m terrified of heights!

Manager Yang, looking as if he had lost his parents, bowed deeply with red eyes: “Young Lord… please take care of yourself…”

…

Two sedan chairs, dozens of guards both visible and hidden, and several accompanying eunuchs—after sending in the message, it felt like… they were left hanging. And then… there was no follow-up.

The message sent inside seemed to have sunk without a trace.

At first, Emperor Hongzhi was lost in thought. While waiting for Fang Jifan to come and welcome him, he wondered what was so extraordinary about this Fang Jifan. Was he a man of great wisdom who appeared foolish? This person had first proposed the Bureaucratization of Native Chieftains, and then he taught three such remarkable disciples…

Emperor Hongzhi had come to learn from him. Fang Jifan’s ability to teach disciples had truly astounded him.

But after waiting and waiting, a full two incense sticks’ worth of time had passed, and the Fang Residence still showed no sign of activity?

Emperor Hongzhi grew somewhat anxious. He could not stay out of the palace for too long. Later, he still needed to meet with several ministers to discuss Southwest border affairs.

So he coughed lightly.

Liu Qian hurried to the sedan chair and said in a low voice, “Your Majesty…”

“Why is there still no movement?” Emperor Hongzhi asked.

Liu Qian was speechless. Then he said, “Yes, Your Servant also finds it strange. Your Servant made it perfectly clear earlier that Your Majesty had sent an imperial physician to visit Fang Jifan. If Fang Jifan had any sense at all, he should know that this is Your Majesty’s immense grace. He should be rushing to welcome Your Majesty, yet the Fang Family is acting like this—ignoring us completely. This…”

This was intolerable.

Emperor Hongzhi was so angry he felt like puffing out his beard and glaring. Liu Qian was right—such immense grace, and yet the Fang Family was treating the imperial physician appointed by the Emperor as if he didn’t matter, leaving him outside. This was utterly audacious.

His face darkened, and he stepped out of the sedan chair. The guards quickly gathered around him. Liu Qian reached out to support Emperor Hongzhi, but the Emperor brushed his hand aside. After getting out, Emperor Hongzhi looked up at the gilded words “Nanhe Bo Mansion” above the entrance to the Fang Residence. With a grim expression, he flicked his sleeve and said, “Let’s go in!”

So the group hurried through the main gate of the Fang Residence.

Strangely enough, as they went inside, they found no one in the residence. Not only had the earlier gatekeeper vanished without a trace, but not a single maid or servant was in sight. The front courtyard of the mansion was as silent as death.

Zhu Houzhao followed closely behind Emperor Hongzhi, looking left and right. He couldn’t help but click his tongue and mutter quietly, “Could it be that we’ve run into ghosts?”

Emperor Hongzhi turned and glared at him, but then, faint crying could be heard. Emperor Hongzhi felt a chill run down his spine, but he maintained his authority and followed the sound.

After walking quickly for a few steps and passing through a moon gate, the sound became clearer.

“Young Lord, you must not think of doing anything rash! We won’t see the imperial physician, we won’t see him. Everyone in the residence knows that your brain illness is cured. You are as normal as can be now, Young Lord. Please don’t take your own life.”

“Young Lord, we’ve already driven the imperial physician away. Absolutely no acupuncture. Young Lord, please rest here peacefully…”

Emperor Hongzhi was stunned by what he heard, still unsure what was happening. The guards surrounded him protectively.

But Emperor Hongzhi pushed through the crowd and looked directly ahead. What he saw was both laughable and exasperating.

Fang Jifan sat on the recliner with a dazed expression, surrounded by dozens of people. Some were talking all at once, some were crying, some were wailing, some were kneeling, some were prostrate.

Ouyang Zhi and the other two had also heard the news and come. They were caught between laughter and tears. With sorrowful expressions, they approached without a word and performed a disciple’s bow: “Esteemed Mentor, please take care of yourself!”

“I… I didn’t say I was going up on the roof…” Fang Jifan was intimidated by the situation.

Ouyang Zhi’s eyes were brimming with tears. What was all this? After all, he was a Jieyuan. Having such a Mentor was bad enough, but every time the imperial physician came, the Young Lord threatened to climb onto the roof. What sin had he committed to deserve this? Now, not only was he going up on the roof, but he was also treating everyone like fools. He… he… he might as well die.

He felt both sorrowful and fearful that his Mentor might do something reckless. Worried that something might happen if they weren’t careful, he said mournfully, “Esteemed Mentor, a noble person does not stand under a dangerous wall; a person of great value does not sit near the edge of a hall… Esteemed Mentor, this is no joking matter…”