Chapter 309: I Wish I Could Make You Depend on Me

I only care about Nanami!

He said it… he said it.

Caring about me? He cares about me?

Himekoji Tadashi had only said it once, but to Nanami, the sound replayed multiple times in her mind. It clung to her eardrums, etched into her very brain.

Her spine went inexplicably cold. Once her body started shaking, it was hard to stop.

Why was she feeling so tense?

Agitation churned inside her, difficult to calm. Was her fever getting worse?

Even though she was breathing wide-open mouthed, she couldn’t seem to get enough air.

All she knew was that the ashamed, embarrassed, remorseful, self-loathing, painful tears she had faced Momoko with just moments ago suddenly stopped.

Because of Himekoji Tadashi.

…

“What are you doing here!”

It wasn’t until a guard shouted right next to them that Nanami was abruptly jerked out of her complicated tangle of emotions.

The girl suddenly realized how bad the situation was—

The guards looked fierce, and Momoko’s manager was standing by, making things worse.

“P…Please forgive us!”

Nanami quickly stepped between Himekoji Tadashi and the guards, offering an urgent apology.

At the same time, her hands, hidden behind her back, desperately gripped the hem of Himekoji Tadashi’s clothes, signaling him to let go of Momoko.

Getting blamed, anything at all—she would apologize a hundred, a thousand times without complaint. But she didn’t want Himekoji Tadashi dragged into this mess because of her.

It was all her fault: for being too stubborn, for acting rashly. Everything was her mistake, nothing to do with Himekoji Tadashi.

Let go, let go…

Seeing Himekoji Tadashi still pinning Momoko firmly against the wall, showing no sign of releasing her, Nanami felt so frantic she almost started crying again.

Whatever happened before was different—they were in the corner of the hall, few people saw. Whatever was done could still be explained or smoothed over. But now Momoko’s manager and the guards were here on the scene. If Himekoji Tadashi still humiliated Momoko outright like this, it spelled big trouble.

And if trouble did blow up, they would undoubtedly be in the wrong, since they were the ones who started it.

The more Nanami thought, the more desperate she got. Pulling Himekoji Tadashi’s clothes wasn’t working. She couldn’t help using her foot secretly. Avoiding the crowd’s sight, she kicked him with the heel of her Little Leather Shoes. She didn’t dare kick hard, but the urging, the worry couldn’t have been clearer.

But Himekoji Tadashi still didn’t let go. Nanami, dizzy from the fever and with shaky legs, tangled her own feet as she kicked and stumbled forward, losing her balance.

Thanks to this mishap, Nanami finally got her wish—Himekoji Tadashi released Momoko.

To catch her.

…

“I’m sorry… I’m so sorry… It’s all my fault, I was wrong…”

Even as she lost her balance, Nanami was apologizing to the guards, to the manager uncle, to Momoko, to Himekoji Tadashi.

Himekoji Tadashi didn’t want to hear it anymore. Because he’d heard it too many times.

Every time the girl in his arms said sorry, it only made him feel utterly, painfully useless.

“That’s enough now,” he said. “Enough apologizing.”

“No more apologies. Don’t need them. Don’t you dare apologize again! Because— Nanami, you’ve tried hard enough!”

Hard enough to make Himekoji Tadashi’s heart ache.

Even if apologies were needed, she’d surely done more than enough by now?

If anyone really needed to apologize, wasn’t it him, Himekoji Tadashi?

Sorry I couldn’t help you, Nanami!

Sorry I made you cry!

Sorry I didn’t even realize how hard you were pretending to be strong!

…

Himekoji Tadashi felt he was just rotten!

He used to think that Aoyama Nanami was simply diligent, earnest, and disciplined.

Yes, Nanami got top grades at school, earned the teachers’ trust, was financially independent way early, earning her living expenses and Seiyuu training fees all by herself through part-time jobs…

Himekoji Tadashi had never met another girl so fiercely independent. Even Yukinoshita couldn’t match her in that.

Aoyama Nanami was undeniably a capable high achiever.

But… a capable high achiever? Someone who handled everything on her own, never needing others to worry or help, always getting it done perfectly? Was that outward, easily seen image really all there was to Nanami?

No! Not entirely!

Nanami grasped the essentials of anything she did. Most things, she did far better than average.

But maybe for her, that was just a heavy burden.

The fact that Nanami could do so well, was doing so well – it must all be the result of constantly pushing herself, putting in relentless, sustained effort.

Very few people just do things well effortlessly.

It was all because she poured everything into doing what she wanted, refusing to let others find fault, and even more determined not to worry them. That’s why Nanami always played the role of the strongest person!

Now, Himekoji Tadashi saw it: behind that strength, the fragile girl who kept her head bowed, apologizing through endless tears.

Nanami, who had come to Tokyo against her parents’ wishes from Osaka, had been fighting without rest for over a year now.

She put on a brave front, pretending not to be straining, because if she admitted forcing herself, she wouldn’t be able to keep trying.

If she allowed herself to slack off just once, she might allow a second, a third, a fourth time…

So she had no choice but to stubbornly not rely on anyone, just to keep the coward hiding inside her from waking up.

But obviously, that kind of forced strength couldn’t last forever.

Today, Nanami was utterly defeated.

…

“Nanami… you’ve always tried so hard. Hard enough. I know. Because I’ve always been watching.”

“Actually… Nanami, you don’t have to grit your teeth, forcing yourself to hold it all alone, you know?”

“Nanami, you can depend on me.”

“I want to be someone you can depend on.”

“I want to become someone worth your dependence.”

Looking at Nanami like this, Himekoji Tadashi couldn’t just watch.

At this moment, this self-proclaimed Pervert even forgot his prideful “lone wolf” creed. His brain heated up, and such big words spilled out.

Nanami heard him.

Then Nanami bawled.

Perhaps after holding in so much for so long, clenching her teeth through it all, these were the very words she had been waiting for.

Words strong enough to make her drop her armor and simply cry.

The helplessness of being sick, the humiliation of failing, the pain of rejection, the unfairness of Momoko’s scolding, the despair of her dream slipping away – it all erupted at once—

“Why… why would you say something like that? If you say that… I… I… because… I’ve always wanted someone to tell me exactly that! It’s unfair… so unfair… I worked so hard to make my decision…”

Big tears flowed down her skin, unstoppable, falling one after another, dripping onto Himekoji Tadashi’s hands, splattering the floor.

Nanami said more, but her voice dissolved into incoherent sounds.

Held tightly by Himekoji Tadashi, the girl sobbed, trying repeatedly to wipe her tears.

Her shoulders trembled lightly, just like a tiny, helpless bird drenched in a downpour, seeking shelter in a dependable embrace.

All words failed him.

…

The manager uncle and the security team had been ready to step forward and demand an explanation. Who could have guessed things would take such a sudden turn?

That young woman was crying sorrowfully in the man’s arms — how could they possibly ruin the scene by tearing her out and trying to pin blame on him?

That would be truly awful. He hesitated, and the guards exchanged glances, unsure what to do.

So, the manager uncle could only look helplessly at their main concern.

“What are you still standing around for? Didn’t you see how rough he was with me just now? He practically wanted to kill me!” Momoko frowned angrily, clearly displeased with the manager’s indecision. She glared viciously again at Himekoji Tadashi and Nanami. “Did you think crying a little and looking pitiful would be enough? Hmph, don’t be naive! Let me tell you, this isn’t over! Daring to pick on me? Picking on me and then putting on a public show of affection right in front of my eyes? Ha! Utterly ridiculous!”

“And what more do you want?” Himekoji Tadashi frowned, beyond impatient.

Right now, he just wanted to get Nanami back home so she could rest, quickly.

He hadn’t noticed it before, but after holding her, he realized her physical condition was getting worse. Her constant trembling and the sweat on her palms were proof enough.

It seemed the fever medicine the doctor gave her had worn off. Her fever was flaring back.

“What do I want? I want Nanami out of the Seiyuu course! I never want to see her again! A loser like her thinks she’s Seiyuu material? Ridiculous!”

“Out of the Seiyuu course…”

The words struck Nanami like lightning. Her frail, trembling body rigidly froze in Himekoji Tadashi’s embrace.

“That’s something she won’t do!” Himekoji Tadashi said quickly, patting Nanami’s back to soothe her.

“She won’t? Impossible! For me, it’s easy peasy! Unpaid tuition, training as a complete beginner, awful foundational skills, constant slip-ups with that embarrassing country accent because of nerves, plus today’s Midterm Performance Showcase where she landed completely last in class… Oh, right, and most importantly of all—she offended me. Any two or three of those could easily get her booted. I just have to say the word to my dad; did you really think Nanami could stay in the Seiyuu class? That’s why I said—losers like Nanami, poor, ridiculous, useless messes, don’t deserve to be Seiyuu!”

“Nanami doesn’t deserve to be a Seiyuu… and you do?”

The words grew nastier. Anger simmering, Himekoji Tadashi turned his glare on Momoko.

“Of course! I absolutely deserve it!” Momoko held her head high, full of arrogance.

Just as Himekoji Tadashi was about to explode again, someone else spoke, startling him by taking action first–