Chapter 100: Come On, Let’s Hurt Each Other!
Chapter 100: Come On, Let’s Hurt Each Other!
…
…
Slowly, Himekoji regained consciousness. The first thing he saw when he opened his eyes was an exaggerated, almost terrifying “tent.”
So scary!
Even through his uniform pants, he could feel that thing’s fierceness. Burning hot like fire, hard like iron, and easily eighteen centimeters long!
“Kekeke…”
The body pressing down on him finally let out a strange laugh.
“As expected of the Evil Eye of the Wicked Lord! You’ve finally grasped the secret of Body Swap!”
“Explode, reality! Shatter, spirit! Banish this world! Body Swap!”
That last sound Himekoji heard before he blacked out now came, much more clearly, from right above him.
But… there was something weird about the sound…
“Huh? Why isn’t it working?”
A clear, magnetic male voice… it sounded oddly familiar…
Dang it, that was Himekoji’s own voice!
Also, of course it wasn’t working!
Don’t tell me you actually think swapping bodies worked because you chanted a spell?
Get real! Even knowing it with your boobs, that’s impossible!
So please, stop using MY body to spout these incredibly embarrassing lines!
Just thinking about it made Himekoji mad. He angrily kicked Chuunibyou-stricken Takanashi Rikka off him.
Huh? Wait, didn’t I just kick “my own body”?
Whatever. It was fine. Himekoji shook his head, trying to push these weird thoughts away.
Kicked by Himekoji, Takanashi Rikka rolled away with the motion, tumbling off the desk. Then, the girl…
Well, should he be calling her a boy now?
Anyway, Takanashi Rikka suddenly clutched her head, curling up and kneeling on the floor—
“Ow! It hurts! My head really hurts!”
Pain?
A terrifying possibility hit Himekoji.
Could it be that the System was still inside “his” body now? Meaning the System was actually with Takanashi right now?
Holy crap! If that were true, the consequences were unthinkable!
Chuunibyou plus a perverted System? This combination’s destructive power was way beyond just 1+1=2!
…
“Freaking papa, you dog of a System!” Himekoji seized the chance and swore inside his mind to vent.
Swearing at the System used to always bring its payback. But now, with the System seemingly gone, he could finally enjoy a moment of sweet, free speech.
“Freaking papa! Freaking papa!”
It felt great! The swearing got more satisfying the more he did it, impossible to stop.
Until—
【Esteemed User, please mind your language!】
“Freaking papa! Freaking pa…”
Ah. He stopped immediately…
And it gave him a scare too!
Huh? Wait, how was this dog System still here?!
Himekoji couldn’t figure it out.
He instinctively looked towards Takanashi Rikka, who seemed to be in agony from “System torture.”
Could the System have created a “clone”? Did he and Takanashi each have a System now?
“Ah! My Evil Eye of the Wicked Lord!”
Takanashi Rikka, using Himekoji’s body, rolled around frantically on the floor. One moment clutching her head crying “pain,” the next covering her eyes and crying “it hurts!”
Huh? Huh?! Evil Eye of the Wicked Lord?!
Dang it, Himekoji finally saw it! Takanashi Rikka’s headache had nothing to do with the System!
Oh heavens! Please stop! Stop using my body to do these embarrassing Chuunibyou things! I’m seriously getting secondhand embarrassment!
That’s right! This little brat was faking her headache!
…
Crap. Himekoji’s heart gave a sickening “thud.” This wasn’t good.
Thinking he had free speech earlier, he’d recklessly cursed out the System. Was he about to get payback from its bad-tempered self?!
【Respected User, congratulations! You are correct!】
【Please Choose!】
【A: Rip off the eye patch, pinch your own nipple, laugh maniacally three times, and declare: “The Evil Eye of the Wicked Lord belongs to me now!”】
【B: Rip off your bra, pinch your own ni(breasts) three times, laugh manically three times, and declare: “From now on, I am the Lewd King’s True Eye!”】
【Penalty for Failure: The duration of your body swap extends from 24 hours to permanent. Therefore, prepare to become the heroine of a gender-bender novel!】
The Lewd King’s True Eye?!
What the heck is the “Lewd King’s True Eye”?!
Himekoji’s face instantly darkened.
Wished to die…
Also, the second thing to complain about had to be the “pinch your own nipple/breasts” part, right?
Pinching someone else’s ni(breasts) right after a body swap? I… I… I… I AM indeed a pervert!
【Please Choose!】
“Choose my foot! I choose A!”
【User, please mind your language.】
“Language? What crap about language with a f♀♂♀ck♂♀?”
If he couldn’t resist physically, he at least deserved some verbal catharsis!
【Esteemed User, I am your father!】
“Son!”
…
While Himekoji mentally screamed back and forth with the System like crazy, his hands weren’t idle.
He flicked his right hand and swiftly pulled off the eye patch from “his” face.
Eyes with golden-colored contacts shone with a gorgeous and strange glow in the sunlight streaming through the window.
“Hahaha, now, the Evil Eye of the Wicked Lord is mine!”
Before the words faded, Himekoji’s tender white little hands desperately covered his own chest—no, strictly speaking, that chest belonged to Takanashi Rikka.
It was humble and restrained, puffing up just a little to hint at its presence.
Better than nothing, its size was small.
It was a match for Eriri’s but edged out Yukinoshita’s slightly. Probably about like that.
Himekoji grabbed that small pair—
Oh-ho!
It was tiny, but the feel was surprisingly nice!
Everyone must know, right? The way each pair of boobs feels differs a lot because bodies are all unique.
With help from the System, Himekoji had touched quite a few over time, so he wasn’t clueless.
Generally, bigger boobs did feel better. But you couldn’t judge by size alone.
Besides size, you also had to think about softness or firmness.
That soft or firm deal depended on fat and glands inside the boobs.
When squeezed, fat felt softer than glands. Glands bounced back more than fat.
But if glands were well-developed, they could get lumpy, especially when pressed against the chest wall.
Too much fat? Then things drooped and sagged, no springiness.
So, boobs with just the right mix and smooth texture were the most perfect boobs ever!
Those kinds were super rare, basically God’s finest work—hardly ever seen.
Luckily, Takanashi Rikka’s boobs totally deserved that “just right, smooth texture” title.
Himekoji couldn’t help touching them again!
“Oh-ho!”
This was the sacred chest of the flat-chest fan club!
Heh, this feel…
Yup! For sure! The best gift for any boob-craving pervert!
System: Please don’t get lost in boring self-satisfaction. Give the nipples a squeeze! Nipples, not boobs!
Holy crap! That System reminder snapped Himekoji back on track.
His hands reluctantly moved toward the tiny grape on each little mound…
Whoa, they were stiff.
Wait! Did that mean he’d gotten horny from his own touch? This body was way too sensitive!
“Ak… Ak… Akito! You… you…”
A man’s voice stuttered from ahead. It should’ve been deep and charming, but coming from Takanashi Rikka, it somehow turned weak and girly.
“You… what are you doing to my body?!”
Her legs pressed together inward, face flushed bright red under a “handsome” look full of shyness.
Hey! Stop posing and making faces with my body!
Damn, so gay… Are you some seductive bottom?
No, scrub that! Way too cute! At this rate, I’ll fall for “myself”!
Once, Himekoji’s biggest dream was dating himself. That dream flared up every time he looked in a mirror…
All because the System pumped his charm stats too high!
“Ak… Akito, let go already?!”
Takanashi Rikka didn’t hold her head or cover her eyes. Out of her chūnibyō mode, she puffed her cheeks angrily, calling Himekoji a huge pervert.
What about that “three rules after swapping bodies” talk? Total lies!
“Ah… ah, my bad, my bad, letting go now, I’ll let go right away.”
Himekoji offered an awkward smile.
System: Don’t you dare! Hold for three minutes!
His smile froze instantly.
Screw your dad!
System: Screw your uncle!
So Himekoji and the System fought another fierce, silent war of words.
…
“You! Still not letting go? Still squeezing? Squeezing again?”
Takanashi Rikka was about to cry in panic.
Sis, I can’t help it…
Seriously, Himekoji wanted to cry too.
“You! Won’t let go? Fine, then I’ll squeeze back! Let’s hurt each other!”
Takanashi Rikka went all out!
Face flushed, teeth gritted, she grabbed “Himekoji Akito’s” chest.
Not stopping there, she pinched “Himekoji Akito’s” nipple with two fingers. A fierce look flashed over her “dashingly handsome” face.
Then, gripping the nipple tightly, she twisted it—full 180 degrees!
“Ah! Hurt! So much pain!”
Takanashi Rikka’s eyes watered from the ache.
Finally riding out that sharp sting, she pursed her lips, raised her head, and gazed at Himekoji Akito with smug pride.
“Hmph! Your body’s mine now—it’s my hostage! Keep touching, and I’ll make it pay!”
Gosh, I’m so scared…
Scared of what?
Himekoji was floored by her chūnibyō logic.
Oi! You’re the one hurting here! Get a clue! Snap out of it!
Just as he opened his mouth to mock that idiot, the damn System chimed in…
System: Triggered mission—
System: Fight back!
Huh? Fight back?
Crap, seriously? Fight what? Don’t force me into being stupid too!
System: Respect the mission!
“Can’t you respect me for once, dammit!”
Of course, complaints were useless.
Himekoji eventually had no choice but to comply…
“I won’t let go! Bring it on! Let’s hurt each other! Whoever backs off first is a coward!”
“Fine, bring it on indeed!”
As expected of the esteemed one with the Evil Eye of the Wicked Lord, quite the guts!
And so—
Takanashi twisted a nipple 180 degrees, so Himekoji twisted it back 181 degrees!
Then, Takanashi refused to back down and immediately upped it to 240 degrees.
Himekoji promptly countered with 241 degrees!
Right after that, Takanashi challenged the limit! Takanashi achieved a full 360-degree rotation!
“Ouch! Owie owie owie owie!”
Tears couldn’t be stopped, beginning to stream down the face of Takanashi Rikka – the fair and handsome face after the body swap.
Pitifully cute… no, pitifully handsome.
…
Dang, you’re really going for it!
Himekoji promptly gave up on the idea of competing in this particular field of nipple-twisting.
Because, as mentioned before, Takanashi’s breasts were just right, perfectly balanced, and of the rare orange quality. If this were in a game, they’d probably be a shining, rare item.
On such a treasure, Himekoji absolutely could not bring himself to be cruel and deal a painful blow any longer.
Don’t underestimate a gentleman’s love and tolerance!
Therefore, Himekoji decided to shift the battleground.
“Stop that! If you twist my breast any more, I’ll rip your face apart!”
Saying this, Himekoji showed no mercy, sending two fingers from each hand into his mouth, then suddenly yanked outward with all his might!
“Th-then… then I’ll smash your head in!”
Takanashi’s ability to adapt was astonishingly not the least bit inferior to Himekoji’s. In an instant, he set his sights on the classroom wall and charged straight at it!
No hesitation whatsoever, accelerating, accelerating, more accelerating!
“PONG!” went the sound.
It felt like an earthquake shook the ground!
Dust rained down from the wall.
…
This… this is way too insane…
Himekoji stared, dumbfounded.
After the impact, Takanashi Rikka swayed dizzily, seemingly completely disoriented.
“Spinning… everything’s spinning… hehe…”
A huge bump had swollen up on the guy’s forehead.
“Hmph hmph hmph, see… see how tough I am…”
With that, Rikka went THUD, falling to the floor completely unconscious…
“Hah… hah… hah…”
Himekoji let out a couple of dry laughs; he had no choice but to concede.
…
[Battle End!]
[Congratulations! Victory Achieved!]
[Reward Skill: This Body Forged of Loli!]
[Skill Effect: Childlike face, small chest, forever a loli! Permanently maintain a loli’s physique and appearance! Cuteness +5, Loli Value +5. Delicate weak flesh easily… easily prone to chūnibyō?]
Himekoji: “…”
Dammit! After all that crazy pain, turns out Takanashi Rikka ends up reaping all the rewards!
Huh, wait, is this actually a good thing?
This Body Forged of Loli?
Doesn’t that mean… I’ll never grow up?!
This… this is awkward. If Takanashi Rikka ever finds out she’s forever stuck looking like a little kid, wouldn’t that mean she’ll come after me for revenge?
Whatever. Just never let her know!
Thinking this, he instantly felt relieved.
Right then, Himeko glanced at the time and realized it was already past two o’clock.
Time sure flew…
He needed to hurry and get the unconscious Takanashi Rikka, currently lying on the floor like a corpse, to the Nurse’s Office.
After all, the exam started at three.
…
Now that Rikka was unconscious, it actually saved him some trouble. At least he wouldn’t have to worry about her misbehaving in his body during the exam.
Thinking this, Himekoji squatted down.
Huh?
He suddenly realized a problem!
Dammit! How was his small, 150cm-tall frame supposed to carry the “giant” that was Takanashi Rikka to the Nurse’s Office, huh?!
Could he… could he drag her?