Chapter 2: The Task

Yi Yi screamed for help, refusing to give in no matter what. She even threatened to call the police. Lü Yang failed in his attempt to rape her and, worried that Yi Yi might actually call the police, had to stop.

After Lü Yang let her go, Yi Yi did not immediately flee from his clutches. Instead, she aggressively demanded that Lü Yang take responsibility for her. Her reason was quite justified: because Lü Yang had pulled down her pants and seen her private hair, and she firmly claimed that in her twenty years of life, no other man had ever seen her private hair before.

Although Lü Yang was very skeptical about this and pointed out that Yi Yi must have worn open-crotch pants as a baby—when she was just a few months old—Yi Yi firmly denied it. In the end, Lü Yang gave in and agreed to take responsibility for Yi Yi.

From then on, the two officially became a couple. Naturally, Yi Yi said goodbye to her old life of sharing a bed with her sister Yi Ya and started a new life sleeping in the same bed as Lü Yang.

Of course, it was only a “new” life, not a “sexual” life. On matters of principle, Yi Yi was very firm: until their wedding night, she would never let Lü Yang see her private hair again.

Although Yi Yi was much smaller in size and build than Lü Yang, she always took up two-thirds of the bed when sleeping, leaving Lü Yang to sleep sideways on the remaining third. Not only that, but from that day on, many of the dirty, tough, and heavy chores that the Yi sisters had previously done were now assigned to Lü Yang.

Lü Yang strongly suspected Yi Yi’s motive for coming over to borrow vinegar that day, but it was true that he had been the one to pounce on Yi Yi after dinner. So, his current miserable life was his own fault and could not be entirely blamed on Yi Yi.

Though miserable, it wasn’t too miserable. Yi Yi was a relatively hardworking girl. Even though the clothes she washed weren’t very clean and the meals she cooked weren’t very tasty, at least Lü Yang could change clothes every day and no longer had to eat at small restaurants that used gutter oil.

Yi Yi wanted an Apple IPAD2 because her sister had one. She envied the scene of her sister Yi Ya showing her photos on the Apple device—swiping a finger across the screen to change photos, pinching to make a photo disappear. Moreover, she could use her fingers to play Fruit Ninja and Angry Birds, tormenting the silly cat that spoke weirdly every day.

Of course, with it, she could also browse entertainment news anytime, look at handsome guys, and watch those convoluted and frustrating Qing dynasty dramas that made her want to vomit blood. Before, she could only watch enviously from beside Yi Ya.

So, starting half a month ago, Yi Yi began talking to Lü Yang about the Apple device, especially since her birthday was approaching. Lü Yang thought about buying Yi Yi a few-hundred-yuan domestic knockoff on Taobao, but Yi Yi felt that Apple was Apple—both inside and out, domestic knockoffs couldn’t compare. Yi Ya said the same, which made Yi Yi even more convinced.

The sisters’ viewpoint made Lü Yang scoff. In the eyes of the once rather nationalistic Lü Yang, these foreign brands were profiting from Chinese women’s ignorance, foolishness, and worship of foreign things, selling garbage at sky-high prices in China.

Lü Yang always believed that domestic knockoffs were in no way inferior to Apple. Just like the completely free domestic Beidou system, whose performance even surpassed the American GPS, Lü Yang felt that Apple had nothing to offer besides its big brand name. Even installing software required jailbreaking. Because of this disagreement, Lü Yang had not agreed to buy an Apple device for Yi Yi.

…

“A message popped up on the Apple,” Yi Yi said, frowning as she walked over to Lü Yang.

“What message?” Lü Yang asked absentmindedly, clicking randomly on the screen with his mouse.

“I don’t know what it means… Is it a game? It says it’s giving me two tasks to complete—one with blue text and one with red text. Which one should I choose?”

“The blue one.”

“Blue text… OK… I chose it… It popped up another message, saying I need to help an old lady cross the street before Zero Hour tonight.”

“Hmm, you really should brush up on your moral education.”

“Get lost!” Yi Yi unhappily punched Lü Yang in the back. “I’ll choose the red text instead!”

“Okay.”

“Wow!” Yi Yi exclaimed.

“What happened?”

“Guess what the Red Text Mission is?”

“What?”

“It wants me to break a cat’s leg before Zero Hour tonight.”

“Who’s so bored? Some cat-abusing group?”

“Yeah! So boring. It also threatened me, saying if I don’t complete these two tasks before Zero Hour, my points will go negative, and I’ll be erased from the world before dawn.” Yi Yi pouted, looking displeased.

“Hahaha, do you think you’re pencil writing? Can you be erased by an eraser? Oh, almighty God! Oh, almighty Jobs! Please erase Miss Yi Yi so I can have the whole big bed to myself!”

“Go away!” Yi Yi punched Lü Yang again, then put down the Apple and ran to the Kitchen to cook dinner—stir-fried tomato and Potato shreds.

…

After dinner, Yi Yi sat back on the Worn-out Sofa to continue studying her Apple. Lü Yang walked over and kicked her. “Aren’t you going to wash the dishes?”

“Not today! I’ll wash them all tomorrow!” Yi Yi said, studying the camera function on the Apple. She finally figured it out and grinned as she took a photo of herself.

“What kind of low-pixel camera is this? It’s practically a scam!” Lü Yang sneered at the not-so-clear photo.

“You’re so ugly! Why do you need a clear photo?” Yi Yi raised the Apple, pressed her cheek against Lü Yang’s, and took a selfie of the two of them, then showed it to Lü Yang.

“Are you sure this is an Apple?” Lü Yang asked Yi Yi.

“Duh!”

“Let me see.” Lü Yang took the IPAD2 and looked closely at the Apple logo with a bite taken out of it on the back.

“Is this an Apple? It looks more like a pear with a bite taken out by me,” Lü Yang frowned. “Is it a domestic knockoff?”

“Stop it! You’re the knockoff!” Yi Yi snatched the Apple back and focused on the screen again.

With nothing to do and no desire to surf the internet, Lü Yang, feeling full and warm, began to think about lust. He reached out and touched Yi Yi all over.

Yi Yi was too busy studying the Apple to care what Lü Yang was doing. When he touched her back and waist, Yi Yi didn’t react. When he touched her chest, Yi Yi shot him a glare. Finally, when Lü Yang tried to move his hand lower toward her abdomen, Yi Yi slapped his hand hard.

Not giving up, Lü Yang reached out again shortly after, but this time Yi Yi pinched him hard with her nails, making him grimace in pain and killing his mood entirely.

“Do you think about this one thing all day long?” Yi Yi finally stopped and glared angrily at Lü Yang.

“Damn! I’m fed up! Tonight, I’m going to force myself on you, so what!?” Lü Yang glared back fiercely. Damn it! Hanging a piece of fish in front of a cat but not letting it eat—wouldn’t that drive the cat crazy?

Lü Yang considered himself quite decent among men. At twenty-one, he was still a virgin. Sleeping in the same bed as Yi Yi but never taking advantage of her—not even allowing a touch—wasn’t that just torturous?

“Fine, fine! You can touch, but… no going lower… Doing that before marriage is absolutely not allowed.” Yi Yi looked fearfully at the fierce expression on Lü Yang’s face and this time did not pinch his hand as he touched her chest.

“Hehe, doing that isn’t allowed, but you can use your mouth,” Lü Yang said with an evil grin.